Prayer Single View

I don't despise God, I know if my relationship with my earthly father was conditioned to my poverty , whilst he is not poor at all, I will be grieving. I don't think I would be in relation with him, or even talking to him so much. I exalt my God beyond any of my family members in Earth, but why should I be poor every time I choose to serve God? My God Father YHWH in Jesus Christ's name I ask. I hate that. Some brethren in the church felt ashamed even of greeting me in front of the brothers, You know it. I hate that. I said "no more, i won't come back," I came back... But this must change, this must change. I cannot preach this. I don't do it. How can I preach "my brother follow me and live as I do?" ... That won't make a better world in a material sense. Understanding, knowledge, wisdom, prophecy, dreams, visions, revelation about this: Why would this imply to despise God? I hate poverty, I cannot live righteously as a poor man: How can I give to the poors money? I say "I can't."